Friday evening, site at a stand-still owing to the weather conditions (again) and there I was lingering about seeing what everyone else was doing to fill their time. I come across the ground workers (a.k.a Labradors …. labourers) lingering round the back end of the site wasting time. Me being the new guy on site I get am often picked upon for the subject of mockery and the like, so when one of the men (same one as mentioned last week who wanted me to counterfeit a Hospital letter,) approached me, locked his arm in mine and walked me to one side and asked me to do him a favour I was ready for a joke involving me being made a fool. I was rather taken aback when the request was me to sit a “Health & Safety” exam tomorrow for him in which he’d pay me a week of my wages to do it (e.g. £200 net). I’m not sure who this guy thinks I am, or whether he does this to everyone, but I most positively rejected the offer, not because it was illegal or whether I didn’t think I was competent enough to take the exam and pass, but just on principle.

The guy’s English is sooooo bad he can’t even take a mickey mouse exam, where you press A, B, C or D to answer the question and generally the questions are on the lines of:

A piece of machinery does not work; do you:

1. Hit it until it works.
2. Attempt to fix it.
3. Hide it and hope that someone else fixes it.
4. Report the piece of machinery to the Site Manager and ask for a replacement.

The amusing thing is most answers are the last one and generally bolded out anyhow so that you get it right.

Anyhooooooo £200 would of been nice cash in hand for a 30 minute test, but I’m not taking any immigrants’ money as a favour.

posted by a-v0id at 5:28 pm & filed under Uncategorizable! | 1 Comment »